Tibetan Buddhist Lamrim: Equalizing Self with Others
Embracing Universal Compassion: Beyond the Golden Rule to True Altruism.
Love your neighbor as yourself.
Gospel of Mark 12:31
The common interpretation of this passage is to treat others with the same compassion, kindness, and respect that one would want for oneself. Basically, it’s an instruction to follow the Golden Rule.
It’s considered a central ethical teaching in Christianity, reflecting the interconnectedness of human relationships and the value of empathy and love.
The common interpretation does not go far enough, and it does not reflect the literal interpretation of the passage.
Imagine if we were literally our neighbors, with all the self-cherishing and self-important thoughts we reserve for ourselves.
We wouldn’t just consider our neighbors wants and needs and balance them against our own—a balancing act that always tilts in our favor. Instead, we would very carefully consider all our actions in regard to how we could further our neighbors goals and satisfy their needs instead of our own.
Mostly we spend our time and effort considering how we can further our own agenda. What would happen if we abandoned that approach and focused our attention on how we could help others?
What a beautiful world it would be!
Make Others As Important As You Are
Most people cherish themselves above all others. Our concerns and needs take precedence in our minds, significantly outweighing the needs of others in our estimation.
Our endeavors are primarily aimed at enhancing our own satisfaction and joy, often to the detriment of others. Most people ignore their bad behavior or justify it with flimsy rationalizations.
Most business transactions where there is a zero-sum negotiation between parties, each side greedily seeks to maximize their own gain at the other’s expense. Modern economic theory attempts to justify this behavior as the “invisible hand” of the market, making selfishness a virtue rather than a vice.
For those with a profound sense of self-importance, their own wishes are accorded exponentially greater importance than those of anyone else. Narcissists rate their own significance at an extreme, considering themselves the most paramount entities.
Contrastingly, Buddhist principles advocate for a complete inversion of this mindset. They teach valuing one's own desires minimally, at zero, and elevating the importance of others' needs to a higher level. This approach, which involves diminishing the ego's demands and balancing the worth of all beings, leads to genuine happiness and a more profound sense of satisfaction.
Imagine that!
Meditation on Exchanging Self With Others
In Tibetan Buddhist Lamrim teachings, equalizing self with others is a critical step in cultivating loving-kindness (Metta) and compassion for all sentient beings. This practice aims to break down the barriers between self and others, recognizing the fundamental equality of all beings.
Our self-centeredness leads to attachment, aversion, and a biased view of self as more important than others. This doesn’t mean we fail to value ourselves at all. On the contrary, practitioners recognize the importance of taking care of oneself as necessary to work for the benefit of all beings. Our self care is undertaken for a selfless reason.
Practitioners contemplate the shared aspiration of all beings to seek happiness and avoid suffering. This reflection emphasizes the universal nature of this desire, not limited to oneself.
Understanding that all beings undergo suffering fosters empathy and compassion. Further, recognizing that others' happiness and suffering are intimately linked with our own helps break down the boundaries of self and other.
Practitioners generate well-wishing and goodwill for all beings, wishing for their happiness and freedom from suffering. Ultimately, equalizing self with others serves as a motivation for engaging in virtuous actions and working for the benefit of others.
Equalizing self with others involves reducing attachment to oneself and loved ones and diminishing aversion toward those we perceive as adversaries. This practice emphasizes the importance of removing bias, prejudice, and partiality in our interactions with others. An equal view is cultivated, treating all beings with the same consideration and respect.
Contemplation
Consider what you read in this post and focus on the following first-person narrative:
All living beings have shown me great kindness in this life and in past lives. Just as I wish to be happy and free from suffering, so do all other beings. I am only one being, and I will not work to make myself happy while ignoring others.
I believe the happiness and freedom of others is as important as my own. I will value myself an others equally.
Object of Meditation
While contemplating the above, you cultivate the feeling of valuing all living beings equally. This feeling of equal balance and affectionate love for all beings is the object of the meditation.
You should hold this determination in your mind for as long as possible.
When you are out of the meditation session, you should cultivate the practice of valuing others as equally and genuinely desiring for them to be happy and free from suffering.
Tibetan Buddhist Lamrim teachings on equalizing self with others help practitioners break down the barriers of self-centeredness, recognize the shared desire for happiness and the common experience of suffering among all beings, and cultivate loving-kindness and compassion for the welfare of all sentient beings. This practice fosters a sense of interconnectedness and motivates individuals to lead a more altruistic and compassionate life.